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Supposedly KHALID MUHAMMAD's REVIEW:
((( Quality wise this diwanapan is Sooraj Barjatiya's worst movie to date.
SEE IT, IF YOU MUST, WITH SOMEONE YOU HATE..))))
KITSCH KITSCH HOTA HAI
Main Prem etc etc.. Cast : You Know Who Direction : Ditto Rating : Disappointingly **
Quick, stop the cacklephony of a parrot who seems to have swallowed a plastic carrot. How now, boggle at the cartoon-faced doggy who's so silent that he never goes bow wow. Sack the irritating kitchen cook whose jokes are emptier than a pageless book. Chase the horrendous Saucykala-type of mom straight out of town. And go figure out why a near blind man behaves like a clown.
Making a farce of everyone and everything from the physically challenged and a Parsee stereogripe to a Valentine's Day celebration (this megathon sequence is like sittting through a super-tacky nautanki), Sooraj Barjatiya's Main Prem Ki Diwaani Hoon compels you to wish you could migrate to a lonely crater on a moon . Swoon.
Evidently, the wunderkind of the bang-on hits Maine Pyar Kiya and Hum Aapke Hain...Kaun.?, has run out of sugar, treacle and corn. Yawn, two, three in a bid to be trendy-'n'-mod, Sooraj Barjatiya leaves you mammothly bored.
And also pretty peeved because of the hypocrisy involved in showing a junior artiste couple engaged in a lockjaw kiss, besides scattering some blatter about sex being a natural instinct( thanks for tellins us) and the several breast-'n'-buttock level shots, all in the name of family entertainment. Uh oh, this rebash of Rajshri's Productions' Chitchor is certainly not the kind of mad-i-nee you'd like to take ur mom, dad, sisters, uncles and aunts to. Ooooo.
Like it or nought, the usually creaky-clean writer-director,in a desperate bid to keep up with the 'progressive' times, has made an unmitigated hotch-botch. Moreover, why hobble-de-hoy on the Dilwale Dulhaina or Kuch Kuch Hota Hai turf..?? Why hinge the plot on two Majnus, one of whom will sacrifice his love for Laila at the marriage/engagement pandal..?? Also why opt for foreign locations which endemically account for glaring continuity goof-ups..?? Example : A travelling shot from a mythical, snow-peaked Sunder Nagar to New Delhi is unintentionally howlarious, the train looking more New Zealand than a kiwi.
Suffer. The taxing three-hour-17-minute-length is expended on a story that's thinner than a hairpin. Once Sanjana (Kareena Kaoor) has declared her spirit of independence at a collage farewell dance, she hangs around in the world's gaudiest mansion with her four feline pals displayed in various states of undress. Ocassionally, she lounges around with a paperback in the company of her well-two-do parents (Pankaj Kapur :tolerable, Himani Shivpuri : heaven help us). Mumeeeeeeee.
Next : Mr Prem from the US, an NRI dollarbugs, is to arrive to size her up as a bride. Mix-up. A sorta penniless Prem Kishen (Hrithik Roshan) fetches up to be given the red loyal carpet treatment. Come to think of it, the girl's mum is so money maniac that she would have gone papayas even over Prem Chopra. Or Crem Popra.
What's in a surname ? Plenty. On dicovering that the cash-rich NRI is actually Mr Prem Kumar (Abhishek Bachchan), the girl's mom goes plain pistachios. Immediately, our heroine must forget Prem Penniless and focus on the dollar dude instead. The frazzled girl must forget all her titillating sessions of scuba dives, bunjee jumping, Titaneek-style poses and tattoo inscriptions wiht the wrong-dong Prem. Truly, the malarkey chugs on for so long that you feel you have visiblly greyed-'n'-aged.
There's a preponderance of songs, with Anu Malik admittedly doing an inspired job of couple of the tracks The background score reveals a Raj Kapoor aria during the sorrowful moments.As for Bijon Das Gupta he certainly deserve an Oscar for the most hideously kitschy set designs of the year.
The performances, often popping through chessy picnic bouts and burger chows, are a mixed bag. Alas, Johnny Lever combats with the Disney Dog for attention. Abhishek Bachchan is correctly restrained, infusing a chivalrous dignity into a largely thankless, post-interval role. Hrithik Roshan goes extra-ballistic, he is effective mainly in the few quiet scenes when he has to emote with his sea-green eyes. Kareena Kapoor exudes charm-'n'-energy, she's particularly outstanding in a scene when she strums a guitar against her will.
Yet neither star power nor a few beleivable moments can rescue the incredulous Prem Diwanni from the Average Category. its eventual box office performance --- hot, mild or arbitary, you can' t tell nowadays -- is not the issue. Quality wise this diwanapan is Sooraj Barjatiya's worst movie to date.
SEE IT, IF YOU MUST, WITH SOMEONE YOU HATE..
Khalid Mohamed Sunday Mid-Day.
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